You’re as cute as an anime.
When I look straight into your eyes I feel like im trapped in a genjutsu. One which takes me to a blissful trance.
I wouldn’t mind being the monkey, if only I could find your smile in each of the pearls they gave me. Your hair waves like a butterfly ‘s wings and all I want to do is to keep looking at you.
I dont want to escape such a genjutsu
But now I cant trust you.
Youre genjutsu has lost its effect.
Now I see a reality. A reality that tells me that you’ve got not even an ounce of love for this ailing heart. No love for this punctured soul. Who searched everywhere for the one who was meant for him. He thought he had finally found her. But there doesn’t seem to be an escape for him anymore. He’s trapped. And this time the bird has locked itself in the cage.
But while he is sitting in a cage of negativity all around him. He remembers the warmth of friendship she provided. He remembers the strength of the hugs she provided. The urge to not let go. He thinks, “was I ready?”
The answer is no.
If it were the other way round,he would have said no too. Because deep inside he is still a kid. A kid who is afraid of getting trapped in a genjutsu that doesn’t exist. A genjutsu called love.
Oh how sad it is to contradict one’s feelings. The power of the mind can be overpowering sometimes. The pain, its like any other pain, it hurts, burns and takes away a part of your will to survive. How you get rejected and end up acting strong by validating that you would have done the same had you been in her position, is nothing but a farce. You’ve been shunned. You’ve been sidelined. You keep yourself up for the others waiting in line, waiting to be a prey to your infatuation. But they know better. They’d rather choose someone more smarter because they’d look good that way. They would look better. But you are still alone. Alone in a desert with trees and animals. Animals who bring you down only because that is the rule of nature. Survival of the fittest. While your weak body seizes no chance. You shall stay lonely for you’re not good enough.
If I could only hold her hands, hug her, run my fingers through her hair and assure her of the strength this bond shall hold. My regrets would not stay regrets and I could live’ peacefully.
What is the point of waiting anymore. You’ve got the power to slit your own throat. Or You can wait for your disease to kill you like the slow poison it is. What do you do when you know your child would suffer the same way you do. You hate yourself when you know you’re just giving life to someone just so you can take it away from your daughter slowly and painfully.
That’s why this genjutsu is horrid. This genjutsu is deceptive. There is no escape from this genjutsu called love for emotions are strong and bonds are stronger. But what you live for is for another generation to succeed you just so another generation could succeed them. The circle of life, the science of life seems so cold but what is true is the truth. There is no place for emotions to manifest themselves, but the mind, because all you call an emotion is nothing more than a genjutsu.
A genjutsu called love.